I was looking for something my father had given to me when I was a child, maybe five or six years old. A kind of toy. I did not find it here in this chaos, what makes me a bit nervous; I hope I have not lost this item.
When rummaging through drawers and thinking of places where things could be, I found other things I had not thought of for quite a long time; I have not forgotten these objects, their meaning that is, this would not describe it correctly, and while I went from drawer to drawer I found that it once made sense where I had put what, when I moved to this place.
I need to reconquer this apartement. For the last – na, fifteen months or so I was basically living somewhere else, in the bookmines, out of the suitcase, and came here only on weekends to take a bath, have internet access, and prepare for the next week. Now I am here again – and it is more than only mattress, bath and desk. I know that in these two small rooms are too many things, especially books. But I will not get rid of them – even if it is a very nice idea sometimes. But I find meself increasingly using them – it is possible to take one of these out of the shelf and even look into it! Of course there is a big cloud of dust, but nevertheless, it’s a start!
And it’s a kind of re-discovery. “Oh, look, the fool was once interested in this!”
So besides all the other Wahnsinn, like  f.e. searching for customers, trying to make sense of foreign texts for a yearbook, and fighting over money with an authority (I never have went to a court before, but even this sheep becomes rebellious when fucked over one time too many, a rude expression, I apologize, but it’s  fitting), besides I say the normal nonsense we call life, I am determined to make this piggery my home again: Cleaning the dust (yes, we want clean dust here), preparing the Balkon for the summer, cleaning the windows – I was told there is something to see out there!
Maybe I will post about things I’ll find, “show and tell” as it is called.

12 thoughts on “Room(s)

  1. I had a necklace my great Aunts and Uncles gave to me when I was five or six. They lived through both World Wars and the Great Depression. I owe much of who I am by growing up on their stories/memories of death, pain, courage and kindness. This necklace they gave to me, that I rubbed regularly with much contemplation, was of a balanced scale. I understood it to mean that my objective in life was to go forth with a balanced and just temperance.

    Although I have not seen it for many years now, perhaps my brother sold it for crack cocaine, but I still carry it in my heart and mind. I used to joke that I “walk in the gray”, not wholly good or evil, but somewhere in-between, like most people I suspect.

    I hope you can find this item and show it to us! I have looked on the internet a couple of times, but I have never found a necklace like the one lost.

    Take care,

  2. It must be Spring!

    Hah! I have infected you with getting stuff sorted.

    I hope you find the toy you lost. It’s probably sitting *there*.

    It’s good to have a clean and clear out and when you look for something you lost, you never know what fabulous treasures you’ll find again.

    Good luck snarling at The Man!

  3. I love the new look here. And I am glad you are still with us and posting …. and share the music.

    I am attached to my clutter but I have enough – I’ve no room for more ….and as I am very attached to this house and home, I’ll not leave it for any greater square foot abode one might offer.

    Show and Tell would be interesting!

  4. btw Norma, how are the babies doing? I would very much like to see them again!

    “Mago collection” – oh dear … I still have not found it, LX.

    In the end all is memory, Proxima.

    My meagre efforts are in no way comparable to what you are doing, Roses.

    Yes, that’s the difficult part, Joyce, the “throw out things”!

    HA! Hands off the silver ware! Use gloves!

    That is mind numbing, LX! But great to see a cat squeezer at his peak!

    KAT! What a joy to see you here!
    I could easily do with one more room …

  5. Thanks! I was ill – now I am well …. I was single – now I am married ….. I worked … now I am retired :-) Life is full of changes ! Life is full – and sweet! ooops! I hope it stays such!!

  6. oooops – my blog is under the radar for a while – I can be reached at

    bloglady at mac dot com

    (my best wishes your way – take care)

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