Where one physical body is the other can not be. And if forced, both collide : bang goes the mirror.
Some of the villages I drive through every day, are pretty old, so the roads and streets tend to be narrow. Usually … this morning I entered one of these bottlenecks while another vehicle came in my direction, and both left hand mirrors came into contact.
I was really flabbergasted and looked at the thing in disbelief while I was still going ahead, I realised my slow reaction and brought the car to a standstill. Walking back the other driver came my way, we chatted a bit until I realised that he was really a bit shocked. His hands were shaking when he lid a cigarette.
We had a look at my bus, and while my co-driver was busily shouting insults and then turned towards her phone to call the headquarters, I walked with the guy to his car. It was totally unharmed : The glass not shattered, the mirror’s shell unharmed (not even a scratch !), door alright, no scratches. So we decided to swap cards, he gave me the one of his chief, the owner of the vehicle, while I gave him the one of my dispatcher. He inhaled half of his ciggie while we talked about this & that, me gently ignoring his bright red swollen right eye, thankfully my co-driver was too distant to be understood. My bus only suffered from a broken mirror shell / box. Later, while a new mirror was installed (they have them stored in bulk), I talked to my dispatcher, and that was that.
After having dented my mirror I encountered at least another three near misses this morning, when idiots decided to overtake either my vehicle or oncoming traffic against any better judgement. So I felt very happy for the new brake pads that were installed some days ago, they are run-in now, that’s for sure.
In the afternoon I lost my cool a bit when someone decided to make a full turn over all lanes in front of my bus while I was approaching at nearly one hundred kilometers an hour, then he settled into slumber mode instead of pushing that damn pedal to the metal, thus gently providing me with a chance to show my driving skills. I gushed out some colourful words about the driver’s family, sexual behaviour & general capabilities, and was promptly corrected by the young man sitting next to me with a stern “Das sagt man nicht !” / “Mind your language !” Yeah, education is great. Perhaps he learned something new.
Tomorrow again, another day on the roads of Franconia. I blame the sun, it triggers the release of hormones, and especially young males in old cars with lowered suspension and fat tyres suffer from embiggified glands. Poor sods. I do my best to keep them alive, and my kids unharmed, but in the end it’s steel, a big diesel, and a prayer.

And just because, let’s go down to the crossroads – yes, old fat white man’s music, but I like it, perhaps because I am an old fat white man, and Mr Clapton still can use his fingers.



16 thoughts on “Physics

  1. I feel your pain. I’m here, in the land of mighty highways and miniature road-brains. I daresay it’s the same the world over. On the suburban streets they’re wonderful, pulling well over to allow cyclists and pedestrians easy passage,but put the buggers on an 8 laner and look out!
    Great old Clapton!

  2. Glad to hear you’re safe & not injured. Driving in the cities & highways is crazy & hazardous. I could never bring myself to rent a car or drive in foreign countries. I’d be afraid of driving the wrong way & misunderstanding the road rules & signs. And I’d be really nervous driving in those narrow, tiny roads in those medieval & ancient cities. I prefer to take public transportation or leave the driving to the locals who know their roads best.

    Cursing is a very healthy way to immediately de-stress during times of crisis. It gets the anger out & helps you focus on what you need to do in an emergency. It’s much more productive than just screaming.

  3. As you launched with a side effect of probalistic quantum electrodynamics, I believe that the simpler concept of Brownian motion describes human movement on our planet. This means the higher the temperature the more likely we are to bang into each other.

  4. I used to have a crush on Clapton. So, you can play him any ole time. Maybe it’s time to switch back to a horse and carriage?

  5. Well, at least you and the other driver were calm and civil while dealing with the little prang. Probably a good job your co-driver wasn’t driving, otherwise I imagine there would be a lot of paperwork!
    Hopefully, this nice weather will now continue and give everyone a chance to get used to it. Safe driving!

  6. I wonder what caused his bright red swollen right eye? Do you think he had been drinking? I agree…. embiggified hormones and moon phases.

  7. Spent the weekend on the autobahn – it is nice in the middle of a Sunday night without trucks and once car per ten kilometers. But when do you do this ?
    Have a good time in Florida, dearest Dinahmow.

    He’s damn right, after all these years. Happy travels LẌ.

    I enjoyed driving in Greece (the Greek part of Cyprus to be correct), absolutely hassle-free, dear Eroswings ! Nice people. But if you want to travel it is better to use public transport or other means, better than sitting in a metal bubble and being responsible for the whole thing. I want to be un-responsible, I want to look, to chat and be totally unaware of the road, or simply be quietly watching people & landscapes – driving is not my favourite holiday occupation, I drive enough on any working day.

    Perhaps I can mention poking nipples next time dearest Norma. >b>Nikos follows suite when he talks about banging … each other.

    Was The Mistress ever caught slowhanding ?

    This turns into an anonymous confession blog, dearest Bubble ? !

    I’m doing it safe – especially today and tomorrow, because my co-driver is down with a nasty bug. The boys & me made the best out of it : One of the buggers played around with the radio searching for terrible stations that play all German Volksmusik (of the humpta-variety) while I contered with anything on CD from Zappa to Fateh Ali Khan. It was fun and we will continue tomorrow.

    You are very right, dearest Squirrel ! Ice cream helps, very good invention. WOnder when I had the last ice cream …

    I think he had an infection, dear Scarlet. He was obviously working on a construction site, perhaps something flew into his eye, I don’t know. In the end every party involved payed for its own damage and that’s it.
    Say, are you reading some books actually ? I think I’ll write about this tomorrow evening, this Canadian lady keeps poking, doesn’t she ? !

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