Georg Christof Lichtenberg was a small man, witty, mathematican and physicist, philosopher, 18th century. He kept “Sudelbücher”, “waste books”, where he put notices, anything that came to his mind. I do not know whether there is an english edition, I would be a hard task to translate his thoughts.

He talks in the cited text about courage and in the following paragraph about faith. I try to give this second paragraph:

“It is strong loss for the single human being, when it lost the conviction of the existence of a wise being gubernating the world. I believe this is a necessary result of all study of philosophy and nature. One does not loose the belief in a god, but it is not anymore the helpful god of our childhood; it is a being whose ways are not our ways and whose thoughts are not our thoughts – and that is no help for the helpless.”

[“Eine der schwersten Künste für den Menschen ist wohl die sich Mut zu geben. Diejenigen, denen er fehlt, finden ihn am ersten unter dem mächtigen Schatten eines der ihn besitzt, und der uns dann helfen kann, wenn alles fehlt. Da es nun so viele Leiden in der Welt gibt, denen mit Mut entgegen zu gehen kein menschliches Wesen einem schwachen Trost genug geben kann, so ist die Religion vortrefflich. Sie ist eigentlich die Kunst sich durch Gedanken an Gott ohne weiter andere Mittel Trost und Mut im Leiden zu verschaffen und Kraft demselben entgegen zu arbeiten. Ich habe Menschen gekannt, denen ihr Glück Gott war. Sie glaubten an ein Glück und der Glaube gab ihnen Mut. Mut gab ihnen Glück und Glück Mut.
Es ist ein großer Verlust für den Menschen, wenn er die Überzeugung von einem weisen die Welt lenkenden Wesen verloren hat. Ich glaube, es ist eine notwendige Folge alles Studiums der Philosophie und der Natur. Man verliert zwar den Glauben an einen Gott nicht, aber es ist nicht mehr der hülfreiche Gott unserer Kindheit; es ist ein Wesen, dessen Wege nicht unsere Wege und dessen Gedanken nicht unsere Gedanken sind, und damit ist dem Hülflosen nicht sonderlich viel gedient.” Georg Christof Lichtenberg, Heft J, 855 ]

The good thing about getting lost is to be found, and I can happily tell that I found myself again.
I am curious about the future.


So …

Thank You.

Doc Hammer mumbled something like “chop it off” when he turned his attention to the syringes again. The lady in the pharmacy looked disgusted on the recipe. I did not grab totally what was written on it because my hands were shaking badly. Asked me how old the horse was. Anyway – as Thompson saied, if it’s worth to be taken …

I’d like to cave in. And get lost … What makes me think of Chet Baker, who was a remarkable good looking man, wonderful musician and a bewitching singer.
I am tired. Things slowly get to the core, and – as always – everything has to come together, business, personal and all in between. Not too inseparable.
The small escapes tend to function no more properly. Maybe kind a crisis is lurking. I hate such events. Did a “personal test” and was “diagnosed” as “The Protector”-type. I liked proxima’s word-game very much she did some months ago, my result was given as “a vagabond sleeping on a ship” – which sums it up pretty good. I hate to fight, I hate to hurt, I can do it pretty good when forced to.

The job is to keep things together. The art is to realize when it is over. I am not that wise.
As Amanda put it – in an other context – nobody knows the outcome. And that is good, because just this ignorance makes hope possible. Hope in a way is lack of knowledge. So when you study to amount knowledge and teach and live life you constantly de-crease hope …
I do not want to think about such things.
I want iced beer. Now.
I wanna get lost …


Sorry, as the title says, headaches won’t go away. I am not too communicative, today and probably the comming days. Tomorrow’s session has to be prepared, so the remaining two brain-cells must work; can’t concentrate for more than ten minutes. Will be back on Monday.

Feeling better

Still head-aches, looking like a zombie, but feeling better. Yes, it sounds like I would have had a drunken weekend – I wish I’d had. It was let’s say emotionally challenging. I hope things work out.

Now, who ever put that Hitler-speech in my comments has to be asked whether (s)he sees that as a formidable pun? If the intention is to “shock” me I am sorry, I read the Führer’s speeches already, so it is nothing new to me. I will not discuss nazism here because I do not intend to give room to this garbage on my blog, it is simply beyond any discussion.

So naziboy, go and have a visit to Auschwitz. If there should be further forthcomings of this kind I will protect my blog without further discussion.

Fuck off shithead!